Fun with Craigslist: Tyra Banks Edition

Craigslist

 [Via Oh No They Didn’t]

ARE YOU A ‘PART TIME’ LESBIAN?
Are you or someone you know a part-time lesbian?
Do you hook up with girls only when you are partying?
Do you want to have your first lesbian experience?
Did you experiment with girls for a while but now you’re back to strictly dating guys?
Does your boyfriend/husband love or hate the fact that you hook up with girls sometimes?
Are you a lesbian who hates the idea of a ‘part time’ lesbian?
IF you or any of your friends want to weigh in on this topic the Tyra Banks talk show is looking for some strong opinionated/outgoing females…please send you name, age, brief story, recent photo, and your contact info

Translation:

Are you a female who’s on the “down low” (meaning, are you a woman who presents herself as a heterosexual, but who occasionally dabbles with other women in bed)?

Do you know a “down low” chick, and want to “out” her on national TV?

Are you a straight woman who typically finds herself necking with other women when you get drunk (e.g., Michelle Rodriguez)?

Do you secretly want to have sex with other women, but are afraid to?

Did you have your obligatory “lesbian semester” in college, but are now back to a “guys only” shagging policy?

Does your male partner love/hate the fact that you have sex with other women from time to time?  Does he only like it when you are willing to have sex with another woman in his presence?  Does he limit your “lesbian experimentation” experiences to femme/feminine women?

Are you a real lesbian who is tired of dealing with “down low” chicks?

If you or any of your friends want to weigh in on this topic, The Tyra Banks Talk Show is looking for some opinionated, boisterous, and outspoken women to discuss the topic on the show.  If you are interested, please send your name, age, brief bio (with at least one titillating/salacious anecdotal story to share with the audience), recent photo (so that our producers can accurately determine if you are feminine/fabulous enough to be seen on television; you might get the chance to strut down Tyra’s runway if you possess a decent amount of fabulosity), and your contact info (because recycling is a good thing, if you have the right look, you might get a chance to try out for the next season of America’s Next Top Model). 

We are hoping to narrow the focus of this particular installment of the show down to lesbians/part-time lesbians/”down low” females only; so if you are an openly bisexual woman, a transgendered female, a butch lesbian, or a man, you need not respond to this ad.  We are trying to keep the show on the classy side (yes, we know Tyra’s no Oprah, but she’s not Jenny Jones, either); for our casting purposes, former Jerry Springer Show guests will be avoided.

Compensation: To Be Determined (You might be presented with a gift bag of free cosmetics and hair care products that were left over from America’s Next Top Model, if this episode of the Tyra Banks Show actually airs).

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9 Responses to Fun with Craigslist: Tyra Banks Edition

  1. avuee says:

    I’ve got a personal on craigslist and have done browsing, but haven’t seen it. But, that’s really low. I mean can’t Tyra just find people on the street?

  2. anders says:

    Give her credit for wanting these people – if they even exist, since she has to go to the newspaper.

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